Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Coming of Age

Of course, everyone knows the Biblical quote regarding the end of
innocence;  "When I was a child I spake as a child, I understood as a
child, I fought as a child, but when I became a man I put away childish
things." from 1st Corinthians...(but, without the hopeful upswing that
precedes and follows.) For to have blinders stripped away, to see things
for what they truly are, although sobering, is not any kind of pleasantry.

This world is one of distraction, illusion, and con-artistry.
We are formed from youth to imagine a world where fair play and hard
work are justly and regularly rewarded. Not only does adherence to
this notion ensure that we will be demolished most swiftly by a world
whose other players most certainly do not subscribe to such fallible
notions, but we are also set up so that--should we survive years of
assault while maintaining said outlandish principles--we will be worn down
spiritually and emotionally as we come to grips with the falsehoods
of our teachings....betrayed, misled, and unprepared.

Learning that all you know is a lie is a daunting revelation, under
the best of circumstances. But to find yourself unprepared for battle in
an environment where most others still in the fight have been preparing
and hardening for decades? It's a formidable task, catching up and
learning on the fly.

Police, landlords, bosses, lawmakers, business owners, politicians,
the wealthy, property owners...these are the people with the power.
These are the ones the rest of us demure to, regardless of how well
we cater and kowtow and play the game. Even if you do so amicably,
you're still under the boot heel of the masters.

They make the rules, and control our lives. It isn't pleasant, and it isn't
easy to admit. All those idealistic pleasantries about 'changing things'
and 'living a good life' are out the window. This is the savage land....
the real deal....the hard reality....the long-avoided starkness.

It's not enough to expose darkness. To penalize it. To counter it.

It's a never-ending tale of endless grief and pain. The only way to
win is to stop avoiding the obvious; darkness reigns, and the only way
to 'defeat it' is to attain it and possess it for yourself.

And only a radical, savage, fundamental rules change will cause that to happen.

Recognize, acknowledge, accept...then internalize. It's kill or be killed,
and the 'adult' world will not be kept waiting.


Thursday, October 4, 2012


There's not a person I know who hasn't made some comment
in the last year that could be paraphrased this succinctly;
"Life never really turns out like you think it will, does it?"

The common theme and the universal nature of this conclusion
doesn't have to be dark or depressing; it's a simple assessment
of shared human predicament. I have made a certain peace that
the dreams and plans I had will (mostly) not come true.

That doesn't mean defeat; I still forge ahead on some matters
while other, less realistic ones that have born fruit have been
slowly released. And I find new interests, new focus, new joys.

It's hard to balance between striving and fervently desiring,
and yet not being so married to ideas and notions that you
can't go on when expectations aren't met! Many people wrap
themselves up in a cloak of identity that revolves around a
job, a relationship, a place...and have extraordinarily tough times
coming to grips with a loss or change regarding them.

But, there are disappointments in every life, and most of us are
not going to be the next Oprah. Of course, in order to be the next
Oprah (which of course would be 'the first YOU',) you have to
believe in a dream it should be. But there may come a
time where you have to face some cold hard truths--decide whether
you will rededicate of go a new path.

The business of life--filled with sickness, loss, death, drained finances,
setbacks, and betrayals--does not run on a smooth track. Some are
lucky, most are not. Hard work has shit to do with it; plenty of hard
working fools failed miserably.

I think those people that go on TV (celebrities, the wealthy, artists, etc.)
who give this big toothy grin about being so incredibly happy and fulfilled
and how everything in their life is perfect--I think they're full of shit.
I think they're either lying because they have an image to maintain, a
studio to please, they're trying to convince themselves, or something else
is wrong.

That, or, for that briefest of moments, while the cameras are rolling,
they're on a high, or in a good place the day of the interview, where
they really mean what they say. But it's just a blip on the radar. I don't
think I'm being cynical--I have just seen way too many people beaten
down and reduced to 'merely surviving' when all the bells and whistles stop.

As the man said: "Life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone."

It could all be over at any time, or our privilege could be eradicated
at any time. The key is to pick up the pieces and move forward with it.

Evolve or Die!